A Simple Exercise for FindingYour Life's Passion

Here's a very simple five-step exercise for discovering your life's passion.

Step One. Take a piece of paper and divide it into three columns.

Step Two. In the first column write down everything that you do well.

Step Three. In the second column writed down everything that you love to do.

Step Four. In the third column write down everything that gives you meaning.

Step Five. Now. find common elements across all three lists. Your life's passion shold be revealed to you.

The Now Effect

We've all heard the story of the lecturer who takes out a jar and fills it with large rocks. Then he adds some mid-sized and small pebbles, some sand, and some water, until the jar is full. The moral of the story is that he would never have gotten the large rocks in if he had not put them in first. That is, work on your priorities before you work on anything else.

In "The Now Effect", Elisha Goldstein recommends an interesting exercise to help keep you focused on your priorities, which is based on the story above. The exercise is as follows: get a jar and fill it with large rocks. Write down one of your priorities on each of the rocks. Then, place the jar where you'll be able to see it often. Every time you look at the jar you'll be reminded that you should be working on your priorities, instead of wasting your time working on the nonessential.

My Toy Truck

Here's a quote from Stephen King's, "On Writing":

I work on what's important to me in the morning, for three hours. Usually, in the afternoon, I have what I call my "toy truck," a story that might develop or might not, but meanwhile it's fun to work on…. I begin to pile up some pages, and eventually it'll get shifted over to the morning…. Working on a new idea is kind of like getting married. Then a new idea comes along and you think, "Man, I'd really like to go out with her." But you can't. At least not until the old idea is finished.

Some of Life's Simple Pleasures

Here are some of life's simple pleasures:

• Fresh strawberries

• Taking a warm bath with lavender-smelling bubble bath

• Having someone massage my feet

• Watching my two beautiful nephews playing together (the older one is 3 years old and the baby is 10 months old)

• Relaxing in a hammock

• Lying down on the sand at the beach, right where the waves stop before rolling back

• A basket full of clean laundry

• A bike ride along the Amador Causeway (thin strip of land in Panama City that connects the mainland to three islands)

• A bouquet of pencils (from “You’ve Got Mail” with Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks); a fresh ream of white paper

• Quiet time with a good book, specially by Tom Robbins or Erica Jong

• The moment right before falling asleep

• Ice-cold lemonade

• Reading the Sunday funnies

• Spending time browsing through a book store

• Reading a Calvin & Hobbes comic strip

• Watering my plants

• Taking a nap in the sun

• Watching a gorgeous sunset

• Putting on a pair of soft pajamas

• The smell of Estee Lauder’s “White Linen”; putting some of the scented body powder between my bedsheets

• Laughing so hard with a friend that you can hardly catch your breath

• When my baby nephew stretches out his arms because he wants me to carry him

• Doing a jigaw puzzle (as long as it doesn’t have too many pieces)

• Eating a bowl of Rocky Road ice cream, and feeling absolutely no guilt

• Taking off sweaty clothes after a long run and taking a cold shower

• Sitting on the couch with some eggnog and watching the lit-up Christmas tree in the dark listening to Christmas carols

• Listening to really loud opera music

• Watching “I Love Lucy” or “The Andy Griffith Show” reruns

• Blowing bubbles

• Watching a really funny YouTube video

• Lying on my couch with the windows open , listening to my wind chime

• Finding money I had completely forgotten about in my jeans

• Creating a gift basket for a loved one with his/her favorite things

• Eating warm, flaky croissants and drinking cappuccino from my favorite mug

• Catching fireflies (and then letting them go)

• Reading an Agatha Christie mystery

• Listening to rain battering the windows

• Going on a nature hike

• Swinging in a swing

• Coloring with my 5-year old niece

• Singing in the shower at the top of my lungs—completely off key—not caring whether my neighbors can hear me

• Watching a movie where the good guy wins in the end, having overcome seemingly insurmountable difficulties

• Driving along with the windows down blasting my favorite music (when the traffic is really light)

• Watching “Pinky and the Brain”

• A vase filled with fresh flowers

• Having a cat fall asleep on my lap

• Anything involving whipped cream

• Winning something in a raffle

• Watching ducks swimming in a pond, specially baby ducks

• Getting in bed when it’s cold and creating a warm nest with several blankets

8 Tips for Overcoming Failure

There’s a certain nobility to failure. If you’ve failed, it means you’ve had the courage to try. To quote Robert F. Kennedy, “Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly”. Here are 8 tips for dealing with feelings of failure so that you can suit up and walk back out onto the arena to try again.

1. Always expect success. However, you need to get rid of the notion of the “overnight success” or the “get-rich-quick-scheme”. People who appear to be overnight successes have actually spent a lot of time before-hand honing their skill. Success requires a lot of preparation and a prolonged effort. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people who feel like failures when something doesn’t work immediately and they just give up. If you don’t succeed right away this doesn’t mean that you’ve failed. Recognize that setbacks are simply part of the process, and that hard work and perseverance are two of the most important ingredients of success. If you’ve failed in the short run it simply means you need to take a longer term view of success.

2. Treat whatever it is that you’re trying to succeed at as an ongoing experiment and apply the scientific method described below. Following this approach is what allowed Thomas Edison to express: “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” When there’s something that you truly desire to accomplish, you should be willing to make trial after trial until you’ve achieved it.

The Scientific Method refers to the technique used to test a hypothesis—a tentative statement about how something works—by conducting experiments, collecting and analyzing data, and drawing a conclusion. If your experiment reveals that your hypothesis was wrong, then you reject that hypothesis. You then go on to construct a new hypothesis based on the data or feedback you collected, and you proceed to test your new hypothesis. Continue applying the same process until you find a hypothesis that is correct.

Here are some things to keep in mind when applying the Scientific Method:

  • Your hypothesis is basically a prediction or an educated guess: “If this is done, then this will happen . . . ”
  • Read and skim through a wide variety of magazines, newspapers, websites, and books for ideas. You can also attend lectures and seminars.
  • Plan your experiments.
  • Keep a log book of your experiments.
  • Approach your experiments with curiosity.
  • Be flexible.
  • Use your intuition.
  • Control your variables: vary one thing at a time and keep careful notes. If one hypothesis fails you generate another and another until you succeed.

By applying this approach to your endeavors you haven’t failed when something doesn’t work. Instead, you’re acquiring knowledge; you’re collecting, analyzing, and recording data; and you’re systematically moving toward discovering what does work.

3. Use humor and laughter to alleviate the negative emotions that often accompany failure. Laughter is now being studied for its medicinal qualities and its ability to reduce stress. It has been found to lower blood pressure and raise endorphin activity in the body. Mark Twain propounded the importance of laughter when he wrote: “The human race has only one really effective weapon, and that’s laughter. The moment it arises, all our hardnesses yield, all our irritations and resentments slip away, and a sunny spirit takes their place.”

There’s even a new healing therapy called Laughter Yoga. Laughter Yoga combines yogic breathing exercises with laughter exercises. In the workshop, participants start by softly sounding “ha, ha, ha” from the belly. It’s fake chuckling, but it soon builds into loud laughter. If this doesn’t sound like something you’d be interested in trying, you can always add books by Ashley Brilliant to your library.

4. Take care of yourself. It’s easier to deal with feelings of defeat in one area of your life if other areas of your life are going well. Continue to pay attention to those areas of your life that are working for you. If all of your eggs were in one basket and you’d been neglecting other areas of your life, now is the time to regain some balance. The worse thing you can do is to deal with feelings of failure by adopting self-destructive behaviors such as overeating, neglecting to exercise, watching endless hours of television, and so on. The world needs people who are willing to take up challenges. Don’t lose your enthusiasm.

5. Do not identify yourself with your failures. You are not your actions. To say that you have failed many times is not the same thing as saying that you are a failure. Whatever happens, keep referring to yourself, in your conversations with others and in your self-talk, as someone who has the full capacity to succeed.

6. Create a “fame wall”. Hang your diplomas or certificates on this wall. You can also add framed photographs of yourself with your friends and family having fun or sharing a close moment. Anything that gives you a sense of accomplishment can go up on the wall. In times of failure, refer to your wall. It will serve to remind you that you have succeeded in the past and that you will succeed again in the future

7. Collect stories of failure about people who have gone on to become successful so that you can use them as inspiration when you’re down. For example, consider the following life story.

This person:

At age 22 - Failed in business;
At age 23 – Was defeated for the State Legislature:
At age 24 - Again failed in business;
At age 25 – Was elected to the State Legislature;
At age 26 - His sweetheart died;
At age 27 – He suffered a nervous breakdown;
At age 29 – Was defeated for speaker;
At age 31 – Was defeated for elector;
At age 34 – Was defeated for Congress;
At age 37 – Was elected to Congress;
At age 39 – Was defeated for Congress;
At age 46 – Was defeated for the Senate;
At age 47 – Was defeated for Vice-President;
At age 49 – Was defeated for the Senate;
At age 51 – Was elected President of the United States.

This person was Abraham Lincoln.

8. Keep things in perspective; do not over-generalize. The fact that you’ve failed at something does not mean that your life is over. It does not mean that your reputation is forever ruined and that you’ll never get another chance. Don’t make the situation bigger or more pervasive than it really is. Instead, remember the famous line: “And this too shall pass . . .”

What Does "Being Rich" Mean to You?

Bling H20 is “gourmet” bottled water that comes in a frosted glass bottle exquisitely handcrafted with Swarovski crystals. The product caters to the expanding super-luxury market. The price for a bottle varies depending on where you buy it, but in some places it costs up to one hundred dollars. The advertisement for the water warns that it’s not for everyone, only for those who bling. “Bling-Bling” is used to describe diamonds, big, shiny, jewelry and all forms of showy style. For some, being rich is about the bling.

Ivanka Trump once said: “I’ve never lived in a building without my name on it.” Billionaire Mukesh Ambani – one of the top four richest people in the world, along with software giant Bill Gates, Mexican business tycoon Carlos Slim, and the investment guru Warren Buffett–is building himself a 1 billion dollar house. It will have 27 floors and will include a mini-theatre with a seating capacity of 50 people, three floors of terrace gardens, three floors of health club, gym and swimming pool, two floors of glass fronted apartments for guests, six floors of car parking space, and a helipad, among other things. A staff of 600 will be hired to work at the house.

However, for every person waiting anxiously for the opening of the next Gucci store, there’s a minimalist whose ambition is creating a Zen garden where they can meditate each morning, or someone looking to slow down and simplify their life. There are some people for whom being rich means being able to take time off to go climb Mount Everest. For others it means visiting every baseball stadium in the US with a son or daughter. Still others would want nothing more in life than moving to a beach in Costa Rica with their partner and spending their days reading or painting. Anything more for these people would be clutter.

These are all valid definitions of “being rich”. Everyone is different, and we all want different things. The important thing is that you make a decision as to what being wealthy means to you, a definition that applies to who you really are and what you truly want. You need to work it out for yourself. Don’t discard wanting the Armani clothes or the Vera Wang wedding dress as spiritual bankruptcy if you know these things would make you happy. At the same time, don’t set out to live in a big house and buy fancy cars just because you feel this would make you look “successful” in the eyes of the rest of society. It’s your life; it’s your choice.

20 Questions to Ask Yourself

These questions were taken from the book "How to Turn Your Ability Into Cash", by Earl Prevette:

1. What is my attitude toward myself, toward people, toward God, toward my neighbor, and toward my job?

2. Do I think and act positively?

3. Am I tolerant and considerate of other people?

4. Do I honestly respect the rights and opinions of others?

5. Do I interrupt while others are speaking?

6. Do I tell my affairs to everyone I meet?

7. Do I practice the Golden Rule?

8. Do I permit the whims and fancies of misfortune to deter real issues?

9. Do I monopolize the conversation with a big "I" and a little "you"?

10. Am I arrogant and impudent?

11. Am I honest with myself?

12. Am I persistent and progressive, without being offensive?

13. Am I blown around from opinion to opinion, like a thistle in a windstorm?

14. Do I cultivate habits that make me strong physically, mentally and spiritually?

15. Do I have confidence in my ability?

16. Do I dare to think for myself?

17. Do I hesitate, falter, postpone and procrastinate?

18. Do I practice the little acts of courtesy in my daily associations?

19. Do I covet what others have?

20. Am I envious? Am I jealous?

Also read, "99 Questions to Turbocharge Your Life".

The Majesty of Calmness

This is an excerpt from "The Majesty of Calmness" by William G. Jordan:

"Calmness is the rarest quality in human life. It is the poise of a great nature, in harmony with itself and its ideals. It is the moral atmosphere of a life self-centred, self-reliant, and self-controlled. Calmness is singleness of purpose, absolute confidence, and conscious power,--ready to be focused in an instant to meet any crisis.

The Sphinx is not a true type of calmness,--petrifaction is not calmness; it is death, the silencing of all the energies; while no one lives his life more fully, more intensely and more consciously than the man who is calm.

The Fatalist is not calm. He is the coward slave of his environment, hopelessly surrendering to his present condition, recklessly indifferent to his future. He accepts his life as a rudderless ship, drifting on the ocean of time. He has no compass, no chart, no known port to which he is sailing. His self-confessed inferiority to all nature is shown in his existence of constant surrender. It is not,--calmness.

The man who is calm has his course in life clearly marked on his chart. His hand is ever on the helm. Storm, fog, night, tempest, danger, hidden reefs,--he is ever prepared and ready for them. He is made calm and serene by the realization that in these crises of his voyage he needs a clear mind and a cool head; that he has naught to do but to do each day the best he can by the light he has; that he will never flinch nor falter for a moment; that, though he may have to tack and leave his course for a time, he will never drift, he will get back into the true channel, he will keep ever headed toward his harbor. When he will reach it, how he will reach it, matters not to him. He rests in calmness, knowing he has done his best."

 

From here.

February 3, 2012

As I was doing some research online today I found a site that was selling Napoleon Hill's "The Law of Success" for $4.95, and I went ahead and bought it. It's 16 different PDFs (around 90 pages each), and I spent a couple of hours looking over the PDF's. It looks like it has some interesting ideas, if you dig for them.

About

Hi, I'm Marelisa Fábrega. I blog over at Abundance Blog at Marelisa Online about creativity, productivity, happiness, and getting the most out of life.

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